Burn in

Physician burnout may not happen. But “burn in” is guaranteed.

 

This was one of my favorite writings. It didn’t garnish a lot of shares and reads. Perhaps because burn out has been solidified as an entity or because people rebuke it or because we are in a phase of creating steps to stop burn out. What was intriguing about this topic was what burns me out.

I would go home every day and feel the equivalent to running a marathon and 6 miles. My body didn’t ache but my mind and sould did. It was a very stress hustle each day. I would leave home with a feeling it was teetering and like a bat out of hell just GO. Along the way I would encounter the weight of caring and of engaging. It was the burn in that both connected me but also wore me down. I took that home each night.

When I consider what has burned me out and what threatens to burn me out I think what burns into my soul is a large contributor. I think recognizing that patients and their lives and stories burn into me has helped me to appreciate what I do but also appreciate how I must refuel, let things go, mourn better, and to keep going and not burn out.

The weight of human emotions will always be heavier than the weight of pending paperwork and deadlines. Still I could do with less paperwork and deadlines for sure!

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